If you’re not new here, then you’ll know that my daughter is 2 now. Yes, you read that right. 2 years old and yet I already know what I consider to be absolute rules for dating my daughter. That’s because I know how I always appreciated being treated on dates. My daughter will deserve all that and more.
These rules to date my daughter may seem strict to you. Some of them may even seem unnecessary. However, I believe they’re important to help two people get to know each other properly. You’ll be able to tell from this that I’m not talking about casual dating.
I’m talking about the kind of dating that has the aim of ending up in a committed relationship. To me, if a young man can follow these rules not just on the first date, but on subsequent dates too, then he is capable of being in a committed relationship. Most of these would be in my rules for dating my son too.
They’re actually pretty simple rules too. As a mother, I can say that most moms would agree that these are some non-negotiables for dating their daughters. If you find any of them tricky to stick with, then you’re not ready to date.
7 Non-negotiable but Basic rules for dating my daughter from a mother
1. Be Punctual
This is my number rule for dating my daughter. Don’t pull into my driveway 20 minutes late. How can you expect to be taken seriously when you can’t keep to time? If you coming to take my daughter out, or have arranged to meet her somewhere, you have to show up on time. It’s a big part of being a man of your word.
And while we’re at it, when you do arrive, look like you care to make a good impression. Do not look like you’re rolling up for basketball practice. Make sure your clothes fit properly and we’re not seeing any body parts that are not meant to be seen. Flip flops are big no-no.
2. Be honest
…and straightforward. Don’t lie to her. Or to me because I’ll smell your lie from a mile away. Hopefully, she will too. I’ll be there to clue her in on unlikely truths anyway, don’t you worry about that. Be upfront about anything you think she needs to know. Tell her the things you think she might benefit from knowing if she were your best friend. A first date is not the place to let all your skeletons out of the closet, but a third or fourth date is, in my view. If there’s something that you know may be a deal breaker for her, don’t waste her time by dating her for weeks and months before telling her. I’ll give you one example: if you’re dating other people or “dating around”, let her know at once.
3. Watch your alcohol
The biggest reason why this is such a vital rule for dating my daughter is because if you’re driving her anywhere, I need to know that she’s as safe as can be. Alcohol affects people in different ways and you can easily lose track of how intoxicated you’re getting. If you’re taking her anywhere, I’d rather you had NO alcohol.
4. Keep your hands to yourself
Nothing worse than feel like a guy is more interested in getting to know your body than your personality! Don’t touch my daughter. Keeping your hands to yourself will help you to focus on getting to know her properly. I need you to follow this rule particularly when I’m around. There are some things I’d rather not see…especially when you’re not her husband.
5. Open doors for her
….unless she tells you she doesn’t want you to. She might have own beliefs about this when she starts to go on dates. However, my own belief is that you should start out this way and keep it going this way. Be chivalrous. Being a gentleman does not cost you anything. It will only show her that you’re only too happy to go out of your way for her.
6. Check how much attention you give your phone when on a date with my daughter
How can you get to know someone if they’re always on the phone or if you are spending time on the phone? You have to first of all be able to pay attention to the person in front of you in order to have interesting conversation where all sorts of topics of discussion are coming up. In addition, disconnecting from your phone and that world inside your phone, will ensure that you are conscious of your surroundings. If you pick up daughter from my home and take her out anywhere, you better know what’s going on in your environment at all times.
Oh, and under no circumstances should you be checking your phone when you’re around me. Not unless you don’t mind never taking her out again.
7. See her to the door
Finally, whether or not you pick her up from my home, if you drop her off, see her to the door. Make sure she gets in alright. This goes back to being gallant. It’s another one of those chivalry-related rules for dating my daughter. Chivalry in dating appears to be dying out. Don’t be deceived. It will always make you stand out to a woman and most of us will treasure it and you for it.
These rules for dating my daughter are simple for a reason: if you can’t follow all 7 of these terribly basic rules, I will know that you lack respect. Respect for her and her entire family. It will make it easy for us all to say goodbye to you, regardless of how she may feel at the time. She’ll get over you quickly enough if she needs to.
Do you have any rules that must be followed when it comes to dating your daughter? If your daughter is already dating, how do you enforce these rules?
*This post is partly tongue-in-cheek…but mostly not*